Intro

All content of this blog is my own opinion only. It does not represent the views of any organisation or association I may work for, or be associated with. Nothing within this blog should be considered as medical advice and you should always consult your Doctor.
Showing posts with label Feminism. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Feminism. Show all posts

Leah from Leeds, Dying to be Perfect

"When women are reduced to their physical appearances, all the things that make them beautiful on the inside, like kindness and intelligence, come to seem less importantThey waste time and energy perfecting their appearances that could be spent developing their careers, bonding with their loved ones, and making the world a better place."
Last week I heard the devastating news a local mum had tragically died undergoing Brazilian Butt Lift (BBL) surgery in Turkey.  Leah Cambridge felt body-conscious after having three smalls and the foreign clinic seemingly offered an attractive alternative to the the UK. 

The BBL procedure takes fat from elsewhere (such as your stomach, via liposuction), before it is re-injected into your butt.  Whilst the procedure seems to be marketed as safer than implants or fillers, there's still a risk of the injected product ending up somewhere it shouldn't - for example your heart or lungs:
“If somebody injects fat into the wrong place and goes deep into the muscle, then the chances of the patient getting muscle necrosis – muscle death – and fat going into the vascular system (which you can die from) are increased."
The Plastic Surgery Group in London reports that, during the second half of 2016, they saw a staggering 500 PER CENT increase in consultations for the BBL. 

The cosmetic surgery and procedure market size was valued at over $26.3 US billion in 2016 and is expected to reach $43.9 US billion by 2025, according to a new report by Grand View Research, Inc.

The photographs and clips published of Leah, show a young (29), vibrant, beautiful, engaging mother with an already model-like figure and a contagious laugh.  We learn about her long-term relationship with a man she planned to marry, how they were building a business and a future as a family.  In the blink of an eye her family are now planning a funeral and three children are left without a mother.

The news coverage highlighted how other young, glamorous  celebrities have also used the clinic - leaving many asking why.

Why are so many young women who seemingly have it all, tempted to risk going under the knife for the perfect butt, boobs or nose?
"The substantial increase in the volume of cosmetic procedures can be attributed to the popularity of digital photography, rising demand by consumers to boost self-esteem, introduction of self-monitoring apps, and increasing affordability of cosmetic surgeries in developing countries."
Dr Jack Duckett Senior Consumer Lifestyles Analyst at Mintel studies surgery trends in the UK:
“Our research shows that women are much more likely to be unhappy with areas of their appearance than men, reflecting the high level of pressure many women feel to look a certain way” says Jack.
“Much of this pressure comes from the advertising industry, with the continued emphasis on photoshopped models promoting unachievable aesthetic goals. But there can be no doubt that social media is also playing an important role in exacerbating many women’s self-image doubts.”
A recurrent theme reading around the topic is pressure to look a certain way, objectification (treating a person as an object or thing) and sexualisation (when a person's value comes only from her or his sexual appeal or behaviour, to the exclusion of other characteristics, and when a person is portrayed purely as a sex object) result in low self-esteem.  

Advertising, "Photoshopping" and now social media - whether you have a girl, boy, nieces, cousins, sisters - we all need to be aware of what's happening around us.

Reports show a trend for these pressures to now start at a disturbingly young age.

In 2010 the Home Secretary commissioned an independent report:
“How have sex, sexiness and sexualisation gained such favour in recent years as to be the measure by which women’s and girls’ worth is judged?
While it is not a new phenomenon by any means, there is something different about the way it occurs today and how it impacts on younger and younger girls.”
The evidence collected in this report suggests these developments are having a profound impact, particularly on girls and young women.
As children grow older, exposure to this imagery leads to body surveillance, or the constant monitoring of personal appearance. This monitoring can result in body dissatisfaction, a recognised risk factor for poor self-esteem, depression and eating disorders.6 
Indeed, there is a significant amount of evidence that attests to the negative effects of sexualisation on young people in terms of mental and physical health, attitudes and beliefs.7"

If you haven't seen it - this presentation from a high school student is a good introduction to sexualisation many may not even be aware of.

The early sexualisation of girls has become such a concern, in 2014 a task force from the American Psychological Association (ASA) was established to examine its effects:
"Sexualisation can lead to a lack of confidence with their bodies as well as depression and eating disorders.".

At the United Nations CSW58 in 2014, Dr. Shari Miles- Cohen from the American Psychological Association (APA) explained:
"the inappropriate portrayal of women and girls in the media is not only negatively affecting women, but is also contributing to the misperception many men have about the female gender."
Outside of TV, music videos and advertising - even in toddlerhood clothes for girls are cut smaller and shorter.  By the time they reach tweenhood, getting a pair of shorts that covers their butt seems a challenge in itself, particularly if they're above average height.  If you succeed with that, finding a top that isn't cropped, cold shoulder or so tight it makes anything active uncomfortable becomes your next challenge.  My daughter frequently bought jeans and shorts designed for boys, because they were so much comfier and designed for movement.  And, they had pockets! 

Last year Clarks shoes sparked a sexism row after naming a girls' shoe range "Dolly Babe" while the boys’ equivalent was called "Leader".  The tough, robust boys' shoes made for action!  The girls' range often can't withstand even a puddle due to the low cut fronts and flimsy soles.


"Let Clothes be Clothes" highlights the problem
Merchandise for boys tells them to be adventurous, a muck magnet, brave, a leader, think big.

Hit the girls' aisle and the pink will knock you over.  Flowers, sparkles and sprinkles with little call to think big.  Leader becomes "bossy" and terms focussing on appearance - beautiful, perfect, pretty etc are in abundance.  Even if these slogans are not emblazoned on the front - the fabric, cut, colour and style fill in the gaps. 

"Princess Pamper Parties" for girls as young as three can now be booked for birthdays - an age where there is SO much more fun to be had than what your face looks like.
Old Snow White
Snow White 2018

Disney market "princess" fake eyelashes and alongside the fact most princesses are saved by their beauty, they've consistently made their princesses thinner and more provocative.


Worryingly "A study published in 2012 by psychologists in America found that girls as young as six were beginning to think of themselves in sexual terms. They were offered two paper dolls, one dressed in sexy, revealing gear, one in trendy, loose-fitting clothes. Asked which one they wanted to look like or thought would be popular, overwhelmingly they chose the “sexy” doll."

The same messages are echoed via toys - as the campaign "Let toys be toys" highlights.  Science, mechanical, engineering, space are all typically marketed at boys.  


Historically toys (and often clothes) were suitable for anyone, as this advert from the 1970 shows:


Modern Lego advert
Just like rinse and repeat doubled the sale of shampoo, gender specific doubles the same of clothes and toys in many households.


Disney Princess "Eyelashes"
I decided to search toys for boys and toys for girls on Amazon via Google.

Here are the search results (in order displayed)

Toys for girls:
  • Toy Electronic Washer
  • Learning Resources Pretend & Play School Set
  • John Adams Chocolate Lolly Maker
  • Toy Ironing Set
  • Learning Resources Time Tracker 2.0
  • Wooden Kitchen Accessory Set
  • Secret Safe Diary
  • Pretend & Play Doctors Set - Multi-Coloured
  • Standing Art Easel - Dry-Erase Board, Chalkboard, Paper Roller
  • Pink Vintage Play Kitchen. Wooden vintage style kids play kitchen.
Toys for boys:
  • Face and Body Paint Mini Starter Kit
  • Black/Yellow Twin Pack Walkie Talkie With Upto 3 km Range
  • Swingball Pro All Surface
  • Pizza Party Wooden Play Food Set With 54 Toppings - Multicolour, 266141
  • Tool Carrycase
  • Snakes and Ladders Ludo Game Set
  • Balance Bike - Red
  • Articulate for Kids
  • 3-D Planets in a Tube Glow-in-the-Dark
  • Bosch Tool Belt
Crafts, learning resources and lots of "homewares" dominate the girls' list, in contrast fun and adventure, games and "tools" dominate the boys'.  

Is it coincidence then that girls outperform boys on all 17 learning indicators in the early years? Yet by teenagehood, maths and sciences are male dominated to the extent 80% of physics A Level students are male.

 “Boys are naturally adapted to be better at maths and space stuff, whereas girls are better at language and communication,” says one. “Which means – logically, according to science – boys should have a natural ability to understand physics a bit better.”
Yet the reality in fact is that a 2015 study found when girls do study choose to study maths and science, they outperform boys all over the world.

The 2010 report noted this too:
"Although the original intention of the review was to focus on how sexualisation is affecting girls, it quickly became evident that we could not talk about girls without acknowledging the concomitant impact on boys and the hyper-masculinised images and messages that surround them. "

In 2014 a project collected all images of both genders featured in The Sun, and stuck them side by side to compare how men and women are represented in the paper:
"The men are nearly all active, doing things. Not posed. The women are passive. It's all about how they look. When I look at the men's side, I see real life. But when I look at the women's side it doesn't seem real. It's all manufactured
"This is a newspaper renowned for sport. And there's not a single picture of a woman doing sport... not one. The only older women on there are a woman on a mobility scooter, The Queen and Mrs Brown. There's a range of emotions on the men's side. The women are mainly smiling or pouting."
When women sportspeople are interviewed, they're often faced with questions about their appearance or personal life.  I'm sure many of us can remember the interview with Serena Williams, when she was asked why she wasn't smiling when she had won!  Commenters noted that in previous interviews male winners weren't smiling and yet were asked about their achievement not their face.  Yet this isn't an isolated example.
"Serena Williams has often been called an “ape” and “gorilla” across the dark caverns of social media; her body has been described in language not unlike the kind you’d find in old timey slave auction advertisements or Old English freak show exhibits. 
In 2014, a high-ranking Russian tennis official snarkily referred to Serena and her sister Venus as “the Williams brothers”. 
In 2012, Williams’ fellow competitor Caroline Wozniacki stuffed her top and skirt, doing her best Serena imitation by mocking her shapeliness. 
As far back as 2009, a sports columnist wrote a scathing editorial about Williams’ body, likening her derriere to food and complaining that she wasn’t attractive enough to him because of her size. 
Her latest Wimbledon win was no different." here
And it's not just Serena, as these Olympic gymnasts can testify.

We're asked if we're "bikini ready", our bodies are constantly
judged and shamed - too fat, too thin, boobs too big, boobs too small, boobs too saggy, makeup too much, not enough makeup, making too much effort, not making an effort.  Clothes too tight, too revealing, not revealing enough.

Women are so conditioned to only think skin deep, they're often just as critical and cutting about how others look.  Body shapes go in and out of fashion like hemlines and women are told to cheer up and smile by random strangers!

Society consistently and persistently delivers the message that our worth is measured by our appearance. It reinforces the message you aren't enough if your boobs are too small or your leggings show off your "love handles".

Being caring, thoughtful, generous, kind or being an amazing mother - aren't revered by the media in the way your hair, makeup, shape or "on trend" outfit is; yet Leah's children wont remember how taut or toned their mother was - they'll long for her warm embrace, her love, laughter and as they grow her wisdom.
The one sexist clothing range, heavily gendered toy or debate about "wolf-whistling" alone may seem an insignificant "snowflake" moan.  The problem though is that when enough snow falls at once, you can quickly find yourself facing a blizzard and stuck in a drift.

Is Breastfeeding & Staying At Home Parenting Anti Feminism?

Prior to having children, I wouldn't really call myself a feminist.  Sure I thought women should have equal workplace rights, pay and so on - but really that's as far as it went.  If I'm honest I also quite like chivalry; men opening doors, carrying a heavy bag and so on - which I'm sure to some directly undermines the "feminist movement" as this article discusses.

Yet more recently the discussion surrounding feminism has fascinated me, that people with very different and even directly opposing views can both consider themselves feminist.  And even more recently still how this seems to have become an almost buzz word as a tool in the "parenting wars".

The Globe and mail this week reported:
"Sling-wearing. Co-sleeping. Extended breastfeeding. Ms. Badinter ( French feminist and philosopher) believes that these popular, labour-intensive practices, part of the attachment parenting model, cast women as mothers above all else. In her view, the Betty Drapers of the past have not evolved, but have been remade into glowing Earth Mothers pressured to embrace their biology: “Their increased responsibility for babies and young children has proved just as restrictive, if not more so, than sexism in the home or the workplace,” she writes. “The best allies of men’s dominance have been, quite unwittingly, innocent infants.”
and
"Ms. Badinter sees co-sleeping, a big part of attachment parenting, as an additional limitation to a woman’s freedom - and to her relationship with her husband or partner, who is often relegated to the couch for months."
Now perhaps the most important point to note about Ms Badinter's comments, is not actually related to feminism - but to the fact that Elisabeth Badinter’s billion-dollar PR company "Publicis" represent NestlĂ©'s breastmilk substitutes.

Hmmmm

The second point to note is Publicis also appears to be the go-to agency for the infant formula industry’s other major players as well, including Abbot Laboratories (Similac) and Mead & Johnson (Enfamil) as this webpage discusses.

So to summarise, Elisabeth Badinter’s job is to increase sales of baby formula.

Excellent.

But Elisabeth isn't the only person to voice such an opinion, I've heard other feminists make the same claims (which is perhaps what inspired the latest PR ploy?)

The Wiki description of Feminism is:
"Feminism is a collection of movements aimed at defining, establishing, and defending equal political, economic, and social rights for women.[1][2] In addition, feminism seeks to establish equal opportunities for women in education and employment."

Right, but what about choice?

Isn't feminism about empowering women?  That they alone choose how to use their body and mind?    Surely telling a mum she can't stay at home, breastfeed and raise her family if she wants to is just as bad as her being forced to?  Having to go to out of the home to work is as restrictive as not being allowed?  If mum is the main earner, dad may choose to stay home or both partners may work part time.  Nowadays a whole range of different family setups exist, based on the needs and wants of each unique family.  If a woman wants to "be a mother above all else" (to quote Badinter) why shouldn't she?   If she was chairman of a multi million pound industry "above all else" would that suit?

If that's feminism, I'm glad I never fully subscribed!

The reality is that women get pregnant and lactate - men don't.  That's not political but biological - and no amount of campaigning will change it.  We also know that human milk is the normal food for a human infant, and that alternatives aren't as good.  Yet a mother is letting down the feminist movement if she is able to give her young their intended food, and wants to (and is in a position to) stay home with her children?  What about mothers who want to stay home, but can't because financial circumstances don't allow?

What about tackling employers to support women to express at the workplace, so they can choose to work AND feed their child?  What about women who breastfeed, co-sleep and work, either by pumping or by continuing to breastfeed when they are with their infant?  Where do they fit into this feminist mission Badinter speaks of?

Yeah, that sort of feminism wouldn't increase sales of formula though would it?  Let's not forget breastmilk substitute's heyday was during the Second World War,  when National Dried Milk was celebrated for liberating mothers from the constraints of breastfeeding so that they could help with the war effort.

But, in 1939, NestlĂ© was exporting condensed milk to Singapore and Malaysia as ‘ideal for delicate infants’, though it was banned in the UK for causing rickets and blindness.  Even then it was all about profit (read more here. 60 years later, Dr Cecily Williams said:
‘Misguided propaganda on infant feeding should be punished as the most miserable form of sedition; these deaths should be regarded as murder.’
What's changed?

A 2004 report found:
"The use of infant formula costs the lives of an estimated 9,335 U.S. babies each year."
Yet still manufacturers are allowed to advertise and in the US give free formula samples out at birth.

It seems to me the propaganda continues.  Claims that men are relegated to sofas because the mum is "mothering" rather bizarre.

My other half is a huge co-sleeping convert as he got shed loads more sleep (in our bed!).  A baby is pretty small, not like another adult squeezing in?  I have known dads who have headed off to the sofa, but their partners have at times been bottle feeding.  A restless baby at 3am can exist regardless of how they are fed or where they sleep.

Ultimately if you have to get up and make a bottle as per the DOH recommendations, with baby sometimes crying whilst you do so - how is this more workable for anyone than rolling over and feeding baby from the breast whilst dozing?  I rarely meet a mum who has both breast and bottle fed successfully who claims the latter is easier - the vast majority confirm it's oodles more work.  Sterilising, making up feeds, having to buy and carry everything around.

The role of a mother is often undervalued in society.  Ask a mum what she does and often you will hear "just a mum" (to differentiate from a work outside the home job) - just a mum?  Indeed a mum on Facebook recently discussing the fact that she worked full time, made the comment that the women in her family were strong and independent and should be applauded for that.  Which lays heavy implication that women who choose not to do so are neither.  A mum some years ago stated she worked to set a positive role model for her children, others are asked do they not get bored staying at home?

Perhaps we have come full circle with the feminist movement; our ancestors fought to work, and women today are at times fighting for the right not to - yet ultimately the respect for women and freedom of choice, seems as illusive as it ever was...

The complicated rules of "breast coverage"


Well for men it seems really quite simple. Generally chests are always ok, if not they display signs to tell them:
For women the rules are very complicated:

Showing breasts is OK if it's hot, there's sand and you are next to a vast expanse of water.  If you are there and see this in person it's OK.  However if a photo is taken of the scene, then the breasts must be obscured "for decency."   Again men don't need to worry about this as their chest can be photographed without covering.
The water has to have waves though, the same rules don't apply to say a river or lake; there it would be indecent for a female to remove her top..


In hot weather it's acceptable to wear a bikini top, but it has to be made of a Lycra type material and be suitable for swimming.  Otherwise it's considered only OK for underneath clothes, you wouldn't answer the door or head out wearing only this item - this would be considered "indecent".

Certain newspapers have a special page to show off the uncensored breasts they decide are OK for people to see, but breasts are never shown on other pages.  More of these "vetted and ok" breasts can be found in magazines - but if they're on the cover the nipples are covered. Also, breasts including nipples, as adverts to sell things seem to be OK too...
What seems to cause the most upset otherwise is the nipple.  Although it looks very similar to a man's, it seems to be very offensive.  If this is covered, almost anything goes...unless you are famous and have sheer fabric and then you can show nipple too.
The rules on the Internet are very confusing indeed - one website "Facebook" has declared breasts that do not show nipple are OK, but then they remove pictures of breasts without nipples and leave other nipples on there.  I'm not sure whether even they really know what is and isn't OK. 

Why the breasts are on show seems to be an important factor.  If it's just for fun that seems to be OK, whereas generally they seem to get more upset if the woman is feeding her baby.

As you can imagine, feeding babies can be very difficult with all these rules, but they get round this by making plastic copies of the breast and silicone copies of nipples (which are considered "decent").  Because mums want to go out and about, this often means they use these replicas frequently, so some fill them with a powder made from whey, a by-product of the manufacture of cheese - which then gets modified so babies can tolerate it.  Now most babies are fed this way after the first few weeks, and the women who want to give their own milk often struggle to find someone to help if they have a problem.  Some who want to give their own milk use a large apron called a nursing cover  to ensure they are "modest".  Others suggest mums should express their milk and feed back via the plastic copy breast so as to ensure not a flash of breast is seen.

Our culture is infected and obsessed with sexual objectification (thanks to patriarchy).
Hence, women's body’s are constantly deemed as being inappropriate when dressed or presented in a certain manner (something that is apparently open to personal interpretation). Men are taught that they’re entitled to our bodies, on many different levels, and women are shamed and blamed when they’re attacked/sexually harassed. [sic]
PS the rest of the blog post is well worth a read, just click through the link.

In fact our culture has gone so far the other way, some suggest exposure to breasts can cause all sorts of problems.... (click the link to see more!) and some consider a picture like that on the link disgusting   Well no actually the text with the image discusses nudity, and the writer appears to be discussing discussing genitals (confused? I was!) ....I'm not sure what they were up to during biology class, but my money isn't on listening.

Perhaps most interesting of all, is whilst many Americans feel:
"Increasingly, in the United States, women are pressed to wear burkas. Such level of submission and servitude is un-American, and undermines women's rights to equality and better quality of life" (Facebook group - Americans againt Burkhas)
Nobody considers breast coverage to be vaguely comparable.  Nobody argues for equality on the old chest front.  Nobody spots the irony....