Breastfeeding, Dispatches & Society - Can We Provoke Change?

As a flurry of breastfeeding related news hits the headlines in anticipation of the upcoming Dispatches documentary, "discussions" reach boiling point in some quarters and I have to wonder where do we even begin to provoke the paradigm shift needed?

In the documentary preview, we can see the a clearly distressed mum needs help breastfeeding, yet her nearest support group is now two hours away.  Budget cuts mean her local one was closed.

As I highlighted in 2015, parents are being failed on a spectacular scale. 

Not just because of the lack of funding for support in recent years, because let's not pretend that we had good breastfeeding rates before.  It's an area that's long been problematic; some groups headed up by appropriately trained staff and providing a first class service, others whilst well-intentioned but manned by those working beyond remit and with inadequate supervision.

Parents deserve appropriately qualified, timely, effective, appropriately funded support - but the problem is much wider reaching.  Celebrities, the media, medicine, scientists and society as a whole fails mothers.

We tell them to cover up, put it in a bottle, feed in a toilet and make babies independent ASAP (ideally in their own room, sleeping 12 hours per night and "self soothing").  We promote detachment, creating a non-breastfeeding culture and then blame those who are a product of the world they live in.

We can then throw in the "Mummy Wars", a concept created and marketed to mothers by formula companies.  This campaign also successfully resulted in a direct reduction of feeding related information shared across social media networks, the risk of provoking "guilt" - reducing support and overall information even further.

Nowadays someone ALWAYS brings guilt to the table and I tweeted my thoughts this week:

We also have formula companies pushing the "breast is best" message, a recognised marketing technique to induce sales.  As a result academics, highly respected scientists and doctors - talk about the "benefits" of a mammal consuming same species milk. 

They conduct studies that hold those not breastfed as the norm against which they compare the outcomes of those who are - creating the illusion of "benefit".

If we hold breastfeeding as the norm against which we compare the outcome of alternatives, we would find ourselves exploring risks.  Far more beneficial to medicine and science as a whole, but far less desirable when it comes to formula sales.

We have major supermarkets repeatedly breaking laws regarding the promotion of infant of formula milk - a collection of this weeks Tweets include Boots, Tesco, Sainsburys and Asda:

We have campaigns like "Fed is Best" - where retired doctors from completely unrelated fields (and some I suspect suffering their own trauma), wave their HCP status like a banner - right before gas-lighting mothers that how they feed their babies doesn't really matter anyway.

Yet mothers, grandmothers, sisters, aunts tell us it does.  Long before science extolled the "benefits", many mothers had a primal, instinctive drive to feed their young.  The emotion provoked as they unpack their breastfeeding grief, is proof alone that we need to support mothers whatever journey unfolds.

We have Baby Milk Action reporting as doctors like Ellie Cannon joined the Nestle payroll.  Turning next to the Daily Mail this week to tell people breast isn't best so "stop bashing" bottle feeders.

Cannon writes:

"Studies do show that five per cent of breast-cancer rates are attributable to not breastfeeding. So there is an effect – but it’s small and I don’t believe it poses enough of a risk to be a worry for my patients who do not breastfeed."

There are so many problems with this comment.

First, where is this statistic even pulled from?  There isn't a citation.

A 2017 review states:

"From the 13 [studies] that evaluated the effect of length of breast-feeding, the report finds that for every 5 months of breast-feeding duration, there is a 2 percent lower risk of breast cancer.

A rather different statistic to ponder as the WHO recommendation of at least two years would result in a reduction of almost 10%, double that quoted by Cannon.

Second whether that risk was significant for your patient would also surely depend on their other factors such as a family history and other health concerns?  Can we make sweeping generalisations about the health of individuals?

Third, shouldn't patients get to decide whether they feel it's enough of a risk to "be a worry"?  Don't they deserve unbiased advice?

After briefly mentioning asthma and obesity (two conditions from hundreds), we learn that a "study from Brussels" found as long as we add prebiotics, "the health benefits for infants could be almost identical to that provided by human breast milk".   There's no citation and try as I may I can't turn up any such study.

The Daily Mail also tells us in a separate article that "2/3rds of people think breastmilk and formula are "no different" anyway.  Despite science telling us otherwise, the general public aren't convinced!  Well I can't think why, can you Dr Cannon?

Perhaps we shouldn't be surprised given this week, UC Davis professor and researcher Dr Bruce German told us:

"There’s a simple reason we have missed the critical importance of breast milk for lifelong health. It’s because science has been completely focused on the diseases of rich, middle-aged white men. Heart disease, high cholesterol, high blood pressure – these are the ailments that science has been focused on treating since the 1950s.”

We have the volunteer breastfeeding organisations manned by unpaid staff, propping up the entire system - one in which highly paid healthcare professionals refer mums to volunteers donating their time for only minimal expenses.

Breastfeeding is competing with a multi-billion pound industry and it's a battle we're clearly not winning.

We can't pretend how we feed our babies doesn't matter, yet the alternative - to recognise it does and yet leave people with completely inadequate support is just as bad. Even with support, without society on board- we can only get so far.  Yet a huge chunk of society including many health professionals have themselves been failed and cognitive dissonance is the biggest barrier of all.

We need our government to step up and take the lead with funding, but we need to think much bigger and better to hope for it to be more than a drop in the ocean.

Why "Modest" & "Discreet" Shouldn't Be in Your Breastfeeding Vocab

I hear so often about how hard women try to breastfeed discreetly or modestly.  I mean it's not as as though the shift to caring for a small person 24/7 isn't quite enough to be dealing with; apparently they should also be mindful and take care to ensure not an inch of flesh is exposed.

Random ignorant members of the public who seemingly can't use their neck or eyes to filter their environment - trump the rights of either mum or baby.

Young babies who are feeding well tend to be still and focused due to the ongoing transfer of milk, particularly at the start of a feed; others however pop on and off, turn their head, kick their feet, giggle, cry, arch or any combination of the above.

A baby who has really trapped wind can wriggle and writhe, all limbs flailing.  One mum described it as akin to trying to feed the cartoon " Tasmanian Devil", another that surely it would be more practical for them to grow arms at a later stage when they needed them - they can't control the ones they have and they really just get in the way if baby gets into a tizzy.

We often end up laughing, however for some mums it's far from funny.  They may avoid feeding in public because in addition to the embarrassment felt that their baby's struggling to feed, the risk of exposing "their whole boob" can be unsettling.

I think all over the country there are mums who simply avoid putting themselves in that position and so stay at home - which in turn means we continue only to see the model standard of the "perfect feed" whilst others are stuck isolated

Why should anyone be panicking they're being judged when feeding their baby? - when many experience hiccups and bumps in the road.  Breasts are located smack bang on the front of a person, which makes hiding them really quite difficult.

Men get to remove their tops without the world ending, modesty is a female only thing.  In fact it did used to be just as taboo for men to expose their chests, until they protested and they're not even revealing their nipples to do something useful like keeping someone alive.

Let me be clear, I have absolutely no problem with mums who choose to cover up.  It's your body and if you want to wear a row of structured nursing covers to build yourself a tent - go right ahead.

What I take issue with is the suggestion this is discreet or modest breastfeeding.

• Modest:

1. (of a woman) dressing or behaving so as to avoid impropriety or indecency, especially to avoid attracting sexual attention.
2. free from ostentation or showy extravagance: a modest house.
3. having or showing regard for the decencies of behavior, speech,dress, etc.; decent:

Synonyms: pure,virtuous. demure. Modest implies abecoming shyness, sobriety, and proper behavior: a modest, self-respecting person

• Discreet: 

1. careful and prudent in one's speech or actions, especially in order to keep something confidential or to avoid embarrassment.
2. modestly unobtrusive; unostentatious:

The further problem with language is when we label one way of feeding "discreet", anyone who chooses not to cover to the same degree or shows more flesh is potentially "indiscreet".

• Indiscreet:

1.  having, showing, or proceeding from too great a readiness to reveal things that should remain private or secret. 
2. An act or remark that is indiscreet, especially one that is not morally acceptable.

• Immodest

1. not modest in conduct, utterance, etc.; bold, indecent; shameless.
2. indecent, esp with regard to sexual propriety; improper

We need to think about the words we use and the impact they can have.  They're just breasts and as the Sparrow Folk highlight they're really not that scary.  Babies need to feed and we need to give new mums the support and confidence to feed their babies wherever they are.

Perfect Parents, Breastfeeding Bullies & The Mummy Wars - video entry!

So I thought I would spice things up a bit with some Armadillo TV!  Or at least a YouTube Channel :)

Here is the first entry looking at breastfeeding in the UK today and sharing results of the poll I ran in the last entry.   Hope you enjoy it and I look forward to your feedback.

A Short Open Letter To Jeremy Clarkson

Dear Jeremy

Before writing your column this week, was there perhaps some sort of incident involving petrol fumes?   I have to confess to being a tad concerned you're really rather confused about basic biology.

In your piece you compared breastfeeding with urinating, and how we do that in a private room.  Let's take a deep breath and cover the basics.

Urination:  Urine exits the body via the urethra which is located in the genital area - it's illegal to randomly expose one's genitals in a public place.  Urine contains bacteria that could be harmful to the health of others, particularly when eating.  Urinating in the middle of Claridge's restaurant (outside of the designated toileting areas) would not be acceptable, and would likely end in arrest.

Breastfeeding:  Milk exits the body via the nipples which are located on the front of a woman's body.  Men also have breast tissue, areolas and nipples located in the same area - but do not typically lactate.   A baby is eating, just like everyone else in the restaurant.  Breastmilk contains bacteria that kills harmful pathogens, and unlike taking a piss in public, the milk is delivered into the baby's mouth.  Asking a mum to stop breastfeeding is illegal, and can result in you being sued.

 To see how silly your comparison really is, try out the following sentence:

"The school children were given warm home-made cookies, and an ice cold glass of urine".

I think we should actually be making mothers as comfortable about breastfeeding as possible.

A 2012 report shows that for just five illnesses, moderate increases in breastfeeding would translate into cost savings for the NHS of £40 million and tens of thousands of fewer hospital admissions and GP consultations.

£40 million of tax payers money the NHS could save Jeremy.  To put that in perspective, it's over 200 Ferrari 458's, or more than 450 top spec Range Rovers.  You've often commented about hospitals, strikes and UK budgets in general, so best to factor this into the equation.

It's clearly not breasts generally you have a problem with, in fact you comment here "All the birds in England have great tits", and struggle to present properly when faced with a couple of pairs .  But I guess we shouldn't be shocked, after all you've previously told us that men see "funbags" as their toys, and like a sports car can't face letting baby "use" them - in fact men generally find breastfeeding "deeply disturbing".

The irony you wrote this for a paper that frequently objectifies women isn't lost on me, because the message I'm getting here Jeremy is breasts are cool, as long as they're out on show for you to leer at (quite literally), but not when a woman chooses to do something else with them.  I believe that's known as misogyny...

The trouble is your stance is actually quite illogical.  To use your analogy, it's a bit like buying yourself one of those sports cars, and then not taking all the precautions you could to look after it well.  A 2013 study found breastfeeding could delay the onset of breast cancer for 10 years, whilst another found not breastfeeding was linked with increased risk of aggressive subtypes.  So even from an entirely misogynistic perspective, that's 10 more years of enjoying those "funbags" - oh and potentially saving the life of your spouse.  So unlike in your analogy where the baby wrecks the sports car, breastfeeding is akin to them taking it out for a spin and throwing in a service and tune up.

And a wax and polish actually, because did you know Jeremy that having a baby and not breastfeeding, is linked with a faster rate of breast skin ageing?  And before we go there, it's a myth breastfeeding makes them sag too.

So come on Jerry you don't need to write controversial guff to desperately try and stay in the public eye.  If you really can't bear to see babies eating, maybe carry around a copy of that paper you write for - then should you stumble unexpectedly upon a nursing dyad,  you can quickly immerse yourself in a vetted, titillating alternative on page 3?

AA

Breastfeeding In Swimming Pools

In the last few months the hot topic seems to have been asking mums to stop breastfeeding in the public swimming baths.

Imajica Gilroy was told she couldn't breastfeed at Parkside Pool in Cambridge as it was "unhygenic".  For anyone in the area, there is a breastfeeding flash mob planned there Sat 17th August @ 1pm. 

Manchester Aquatics Centre allegedly told Stephanie Wilby it was "indecent exposure", and Stephanie claims the staff likened it to someone urinating in the pool. Breastfeeding flash mob there planned Friday 16th @ 10am.  Stephanie also claims staff shouted at her to stop immediately, causing a scene - but I don't want to dwell on that as I think it detracts from the real issue.

What's interesting about swimming pools is that unlike other venues, even pro breastfeeding mums often say if the rule is no eating this should apply to all.

So I wanted to reply to a few common comments :)

1.  Breastmilk could get in the water.
If we're concerned about breastmilk getting in the water, all lactating mums should be stopped from swimming in case they leak.  I'm also wondering why when breastfeeding we would expect milk to be pooling around the mother in the water, er no it's going into baby!

b)  Even if breastmilk gets into the water, it is antibacterial, antimicrobial and doesn't pose a health hazard.

Lots of things that do pose a health hazard end up in the water.  It's rather ironic that Manchester Aquatics Centre allegedly likened it to someone urinating in the pool - because I'm sure plenty of toddlers have a sneaky pee in there, and have they ever tested for "leakage" in those without great pelvic floor muscles when doing the breaststroke?  Perhaps they should ban them too! Sweat, urine, mucous, saliva, hair, dead skin and faecal matter - not to mention sun cream, perfume and cosmetics - are among the pollutants introduced by bathers into pools.  Lordy a breastmilk bath is looking more desirable by the minute.

2.  Baby could vomit after feeding.
This is kind of a futile argument with babies though given a) they can puke anytime, even an hour or two after a feed.  b)  If the mum is leaving the area to feed as expected and then returning with baby, he may still vomit.  Some babies just don't posset, my first only ever did twice, both times after we had tried colief.

Those who have babies who are prone to refluxing copious amounts are hardly unlikely to breastfeed in the pool anyway, mums don't lose their brains when they get a baby - often the person most aware and conscious is the mum.

Important point to note:
Swimming pools are chlorinated.  

Swimming pools are chlorinated.  

Swimming pools are chlorinated.

I feel a need to repeat this as any argument over "water contamination" is wiped out with this point.

Chlorine is known to kill almost all kinds of bacteria, as well as viruses and protozoa - hence why it's used in pools. When chlorine isn't used, the bacteria in pools is comparable to that of a toilet - without anyone breastfeeding.

6.  It's indecent. 

Sorry but I'm frequently glad my eyes have an avert function when at the public baths, budgie smugglers anyone?  Aside from this it breaks the law to ask a mother to stop breastfeeding on the grounds of decency.

7.   If the rule is no eating, that means everyone.
This rule is clearly to avoid Big Mac and chips finding their way into the water, imagine if everyone took snacks!  Babies sometimes need feeding several times in an hour, whereas adults can consider the fact they are going swimming and eat more in advance.  They can also wait when hungry because they don't survive solely on a substance digested quickly and have bigger stomachs.

Furthermore the breast isn't just food,  I think a lot of people still struggle to grasp that babies don't just seek the breast when hungry.  They can do so for comfort, reassurance at a new situation (like swimming), or because they want to warm up if feeling chilly.  Furthermore we know babies don't always transfer milk - so they may not in fact be "eating" in the pool at all, they could be sucking for comfort. Are pacifiers, a nipple replica also banned?  What if they suck their own fingers?  Is sucking mum's finger OK but not her nipple?

8.  I think the mum should have got out and done it in the changing rooms.
Why?  It's not always convenient for mum to hot foot it off to the changing room, she may have an older child to supervise who cannot be left.

9.  It's unhygienic for baby.
How?  When attached to the breast the baby forms a seal, there is less likelihood of them ingesting water than when they're swimming in it. Mothers are also hardly likely to have their baby's face half in the water, don't believe me, you can see a great example here.  Some baby swimming classes involve submerging both mouth and nose under water, yet I've never heard anyone express concern that is unhygienic.

If you think pool water is that gross despite the chlorine, perhaps better off not taking your baby at all. Ultimately it's the mother's choice whether she feels it's a hygiene risk to her baby or not?

10. Other babies have to wait so why should breastfed babies be any different!
Oh no, I would be quite happy for a mum to bottle feed her baby or use a pacifier in the pool too! Not suggesting certain babies get special treatment, all have the same needs whether met by breast or bottle; our society has been intolerant of babies and children for long enough.

Unlike no petting, bombing or ducking - I can't think of a single plausible, logical reason why a baby cannot feed in a pool.  Nor has anyone else been able to offer one other than the rules say so.

Which tells me the rules need changing :)

With regard to Stephanie's case above, a spokeswoman for Serco said:

"We are fully supportive of mothers breastfeeding their child whilst in our centres.  Serco’s operating practices are to encourage breastfeeding in a safe and comfortable environment for both the mother and child rather than it taking place in the swimming pool."

Serco are you seriously suggesting breastfeeding in the pool is more dangerous than a baby swimming in it?  If so why?  I also trust we can let mums choose to decide where they are most "comfortable"?

There is a petition here to ask Manchester Aquatics to review their policies

Councillor Rosa Battle, executive member for culture and leisure at Manchester council, said: 

"We have asked the Manchester Sport and Leisure Trust and Serco to investigate this incident thoroughly and to take action immediately if it is established that any members of staff behaved inappropriately towards Stephanie.  We have also asked that the Trust and Serco review their existing policies, to make sure that they reflect the law.".

Update:

"Lifeguards at Manchester Aquatics Centre told they CAN’T stop mums breastfeeding"

"Now the M.E.N. has seen an internal memo sent to staff warning them not to discriminate against breastfeeding mums and warning ‘we must comply with the law’." - read more here

What I'm really thinking: the breast-feeding mother

In response to "What I'm really thinking: the bottle-feeding mother" published Guardian Friday 6 January 2012

I see the bottle feeding mothers watching me as I fumble around under my breastfeeding apron, trying to latch on a wiggly baby that I can't see.  Those looks speak a thousand words, most of which boil down to, "don't flash an inch of flesh in public, we're feeding our babies without exposing ourselves, why aren't you?"

I feel as if they're judging me, they can have dad, gran, friends feed their baby, whilst I'm tied to mine almost 24/7.  Do they feel superior to me? Certainly I feel that I have to defend my decision to continue through sore nipples and growth spurts, justify why I don't just give a bottle, so they'll accept me.

They sit at the postnatal groups, beady eyes peering at me, bottle lids clicking as my son nurses hungrily.  But I can't help noticing how their looks change - A bit of envy maybe - when I start to breastfeed.  My guess is they're thinking, "that looks a lot more efficient than bottle feeding".  You're right, I want to tell them.

I can almost hear the deafening mental processing in those staid church halls: "She won't have to make up a bottle each feed, sterilise them, tote them around.  And imagine just being able to roll over at night and have an instant feed, nobody has to get up to make it, and a built in pacifier."

But I don't want to fall into the trap of judging them too harshly, either.  I could easily have ended up bottle feeding, if I didn't get the support that helped me succeed with breastfeeding, most have no idea what they're missing.  Now I've cracked breastfeeding, I see the advantages. I'd even choose it again next time. It's really not so bad, I want to tell them, after the early weeks are mastered ..
END

The point of this is to demonstrate how ridiculous the original article was.  As one reader said on Facebook, it would have been more accurately titled - What I think you're thinking.  The reality is that most breast feeders are just trying to get on and feed their baby "discreetly", not judging others, and most bottle feeders are doing the same - it seems everyone feels judged regardless of how they feed their baby.  Articles like this, just further hot up the "mummy wars", and we all know how profitable that is.

If I were more of a cynic, I might even wonder if this is a genuine "mummy article" - opinion pieces are free of the "breast is best message" that has to accompany standard articles, and AF companies are not allowed to advertise... The insidious comments re breastfeeding (from someone who didn't do it) and "try it you might like it" theme could be eyebrow raising for some..Just a thought

Why breastfeeding is NOT like taking a dump!

Earlier this morning whilst scanning the news, I spotted this article.  It outlines how a Michigan judge chose to publicly humiliate a mother; not for neglect, drug abuse or some other heinous crime judges like this must come across - but because she went to the back of the court room and began discreetly breastfeeding her fussing, unwell young baby.

When the mother defended her position by pointing out breastfeeding in public was her legal right, the judge claimed state laws did not apply in his court:

“Ma’am, it’s my courtroom, I decide what’s appropriate in here. Come on up, okay? You have to understand that a judge — the laws don’t apply in a courtroom. The judge’s law applies, do you understand that?

If this is indeed true, surely all attending should be given full details of what the the judge's whims laws are, otherwise how can anyone ensure they remain "judge's law" abiding?

Clearly anyone carrying a baby should be specifically told the  "breastfeeding is forbidden" rule - otherwise how are the mums supposed to know?  Given every health authority in the world (including the US) recognises the alternatives carry risks and so advise mums to breastfeed for a minimum of six months - why would anyone suspect a different US government building would defy state laws in order to prevent it?

The first comments that followed the piece were just as incredulous:

"Yes, breastfeeding is a natural bodily function vital for survival. 

So is taking a dump. 

But we don’t rail on about people’s right to do it in public. 

I’m sorry, as a woman and a feminist and a college-educated female feminist, I still think breast-feeding should be a private act and I fail to see why it’s such a horrible anti-feminist, anti-woman and anti-baby stance."

Had this been the first time I had ever had the misfortune to read such an ignorant rant, I would probably have just closed the page.  But comparing breastfeeding to toilet habits seems to be a pretty standard argument against public breastfeeding (particularly if you've ever picked up the Daily Mail) frankly it's crap, if you excuse the pun.

"As a woman and a feminist and a college-educated female feminist"

OK we get you're female and a feminist (twice) but it seems college clearly didn't adequately cover "bodily functions", so let's go right back to basics.

Feces

Feces, faeces, or fæces is a waste product from an animal's digestive tract expelled through the anus or cloaca during defecation. The word faeces is the plural of the Latin word fæx meaning "dregs".

The distinctive odor of feces is due to bacterial action. The perceived bad odor of feces has been hypothesized to be a deterrent for humans, as consumption or touching it may result in sickness or infection.[4]

Human breast milk

Breast milk is the milk produced by the breasts of a human female for her infant offspring. Milk is the primary source of nutrition for newborns before they are able to eat and digest other foods; older infants and toddlers may continue to be breastfed, either exclusively or in combination with other foods. 

After 3 to 4 days, breasts will begin producing milk that is thin, watery, and sweet. This quenches the baby's thirst and provides the proteins, sugar, and minerals that the baby needs. Over time, the milk changes and becomes thick and creamy. This satisfies the baby's hunger.[16]

The first contains potentially harmful pathogens that can cause sickness or infection, hands need thoroughly washing afterwards and thus a bathroom is a sensible idea; not to mention, where would you put a random dump in a court room?

The second is an antibacterial, antimicrobial substance that has been shown to actively kill infections - hands do not need washing post breastfeed; milk goes into baby.

I'm hoping I don't need to point out the differences between an anus and a breast!

Breastfeeding is no less hygienic than anyone else sat eating (and a great deal more so than some people's "washing machine style" of food processing that I frequently have to witness).  If the mum was sat squirting it around the room rather than into her baby's mouth, I could perhaps see the issue!

Next, does any one else see the irony in someone purporting to be a feminist, yet who also supports the suppression of women using their breasts for their intended purpose?

Isn't that rather like someone calling themselves an "advocate for same sex marriage", right before adding "as long as they are only a couple in private and don't rail on about wanting rights to be affectionate in public" ?  Then claiming they fail to see why that is an anti-homosexual stance....

Feminism

Feminism is a collection of movements aimed at defining, establishing, and defending equal political, economic, and social rights and equal opportunities for women

Yet men can even go topless in public right?

Breast Bottle

What makes it a private act, why is a real breast so much more inappropriate than a plastic replica of a breast and nipple, or just a nipple in the form of a pacifier? Would it have caused such a brouhaha had the mum pulled out either of those instead of the genuine article?

What should this mother have done? She presumably had to attend the court, she had to take her unwell nursling - had she denied his cues to feed, he would likely have cried, loudly; is that appropriate for a court room? Would that not have disturbed proceedings far more? No doubt then the "dump brigade" would have been tutting and muttering about how inappropriate the noise was.  Perhaps babies just shouldn't be allowed in public full stop?

Society needs to realise that milk of our own species is the normal way to feed a baby, and if it's a location a baby is permitted, a mother has a basic human right to be able to feed her baby as he requires without doing so in a toilet or a stinky nappy changing room.  Why should a hungry baby incapable of waiting, have less right to eat than an "educated female feminist"?

Related Posts: 
Breastfeeding mums should use a bottle in public!

Breastfeeding in public is offensive - see for yourself!

Let's do breastfeeding covers

Tips for breastfeeding in public if you feel self-conscious

Breastfeeding mums should use a bottle in public!

This one of the ridiculous lines I heard this week.

Because some people fail to understand the basic notion of mammals - they expect others to express their milk, use a plastic replica of their breast, and a silicone copy of their nipple - or go hide in another room. Breastfeeding in public is just offensive! And you know maybe they're onto something?

There are lots of things I would rather not look at:

This isn't too appealing:

Mmm isn't this attractive:

IRK messy eaters!

Eating with mouth open (yep sorry even if it's a cute kid!):

Ew and this:

Imagine this face eating:

Anyone eating fish - I hate the smell!

Jeremy Clarkson - who states in his column: Men do not find breastfeeding natural. We find it deeply disturbing. This is because men do not see breasts as part of the reproductive process. We see it as a plaything, a toy. And letting a baby use it is like letting a baby use the sports car we keep in the garage for sunny days. The mewling, squawking infant will tuin it. And invariably, of course, it does. Thanks Jeremy for speaking on behalf of all men....

I imagine vegetarians don't enjoy seeing this

and vegans would probably prefer not to see this:

Let's think what else?  Some people object to same sex relationships, or to those of a different faith or ethnic origin.

Hey, maybe we need a whole range of special rooms - so anyone who could potentially be offensive to anyone else, could be segregated....hmmmm actually I think that would mean everyone would need their own private "eating booth".  Perhaps that's the future if society can't get to grips with the "avert function" eyes have, or maybe we could get an i-Phone app to help with that?

Tips for breastfeeding in public if you feel self-conscious

Firstly please remember a lot of mums feel daunted the first few times they breastfeed in public.  As discussed in my "Let's do breastfeeding covers" entry, even those who are confident now may well have felt a little nervous at first - particularly if you live in an area where you don't see lots of mums feeding.

In all honesty even non breastfeeding mums can feel apprehensive too!  Previous discussions here and on Facebook have shown bottle feeding mums are concerned people are judging them over not breastfeeding - so it seems a lot of mums are sensitive to how other perceive them either way.  It's nice to remember this and always smile at a mum with a baby, regardless of how she is feeding.

Public breastfeeding really is one of those things that quickly becomes "normal", the more you do it the easier it becomes - the more you put it off or build it up, the worse it can seem (bit like many things). So I thought I would share some tips and alternatives to covers if you feel self conscious (and kudos if you don't!); feel free to reply with yours.

Hints & Tips

• Don't panic in the early days:  Some mums express concern at how "obvious" feeding their newborn is when concentrating on getting baby latched well;  wondering if they will ever be "discreet enough" to feel comfortable doing it in public.  Take each day as it comes, even if you feel you need to cover up more now, this may well change as you both gain confidence and baby develops.
  

• Practice feeding at home in front of a full length mirror:  When you are looking down on baby feeding, you can see much more than someone opposite you.  Feeding in front of a mirror gives a better idea of the view others get whilst feeding.

Angelina Jolie

• Start small:  Often you will hear people say "I can't even feed in front of family", but actually family can more daunting than strangers for some mums!  It can be a good idea to practice a few times in a place you feel comfortable - perhaps a local quiet park or friendly village library or cafe.

• Lean back slightly when you feed: If you have a baby that "pops off" frequently, this can be more obvious in typical supine positions such as the cradle or cross cradle hold.  As demonstrated on the left by Angelina Jolie, leaning back slightly makes baby more prone, so if they pop off their head still blocks the view.  It can also reduce the amount of coming off and reattaching babies as gravity is on their side!

"V" Clutch Hold

• Try different positions: Mums sometimes express feeling more exposed if they use a hold such as the clutch/ruby/football hold, because their breast is not shielded by baby's head in the same way.  If this position works for you and baby, modifying it to an upright "V clutch hold" can work even better for some mums.  

You begin holding baby as you would for a typical clutch hold, then move baby upright until he forms a "V" shape with his body (as per the picture on the right).  Your breast size/shape and the length of baby will determine where baby's legs and feet end up.  When supporting baby in this hold, use your wrist and palm to provide firm support to baby's shoulder and upper back, with the thumb and first finger holding under baby's ears.  You should avoid placing your hands higher than the ears and onto baby's head as feeding nerves run through this area.  Pressure can therefore cause baby to pull backwards from the breast or stop rooting/latching behaviours.

• Experiment with different clothing.  Some mums find specific breastfeeding clothes are great, others find them tricky - with holes or slits in the wrong places depending upon your shape!  If you have small to medium breasts, wearing a stretchy vest top that can be pulled down at one side to feed, with an open shirt/cardigan over the top can feel very covered.  Alternatively you can also buy breastfeeding vest tops that can work well for this such as the Glamourmom Tank, or the Breast Vest you can layer.  A normal shirt can work well too, as when opened slightly it creates a "flap" for cover - without having to be opened all the way down if you feel sensitive about your tummy area.  Alternatively you can cover tummy using a "boob tube" pulled down to around your middle, or again buy something made for the job such as a band (just covers tummy area) or a BelleBelly which covers from underbust to hips.

Some mums say breastfeeding clothes are "boring" or "obvious" ie a zip or flap under the breast area, and they want to get back into stylish clothes.   If this is you check out Bella Mama who have a wide range of modern nursing clothes with different opening options.  There are lots of modern ranges available now - feel free to recommend any you love!

Alternative to Nursing Covers
Perhaps the most obvious alternative to a nursing cover is a baby carrier or sling.  These have the added bonus over a cover in that you can also carry baby in them, give yourself some hands free time, and are often fab for soothing an unsettled infant  You can pick a carrier based on what positions work well for you.  My favourite carriers for breastfeeding, in no particular order...

Ring Sling: Suitable from newborn through to toddlerhood.

With a ring sling it's easy to pull the sling higher up baby's head, which provides even more cover whilst still giving you a clear view of baby.

If feeding sitting down you can loosen the ring to allow the top rail to pull looser and provide as much fabric as you need, again giving lots of play to use as a "fixed in place cover" even if you want to move baby to a more upright/tummy to tummy position from a different carry.  With a bit of practice you may also be able to master adjusting the sling to allow you to walk around breastfeeding hands free, with the sling supporting baby.

Reach into the sling and arrange your clothing. Turn your baby so they are tummy to tummy with their head in the correct position to reach the breast for latch on. Once they are happy feeding you can tighten the sling to fully support your baby so that your hands are free. This may take practise but is worth persevering, then you can breastfeed anywhere. (slingeasy.co.uk)

A sling also covers the tummy area for those that prefer and ring slings with a tail (as per the picture on the right) provide another swathe of fabric for the super conscious to pull over the top.

Cradle hold

Upright hold

Pouch Sling - Best for mums who like a quick on and off with little learning curve.

As they are a fixed size, they have slightly less flexibility than a ring sling - however their simple on off design make them popular with many mums.  For a young infant they work well for breastfeeding in a cradle or more upright hold, however for an older infant you may need to sit down to pull sufficient fabric up around the back of their head (ie fabric that is normally positioned further down) to use an upright position.

Home made Mei Tai

Kozy Carrier

Mei Tai- Great for upright/underarm nursing positions.

Mei Tais are great for mums that prefer a two shoulder hold.  With a newborn or young baby, you should fold their legs froggie style, rather than splayed either side of the carrier hanging down.

To feed you can sit down and loosen the straps, which allows you to move baby into a different position whilst still being covered from the front.  Some also have a sleep hood, you can see the brown satin hood on the carrier to the right.  As baby gets taller this can be pulled up and secured to the straps, providing extra coverage if required.

Again you can wear a jacket, cardigan or open shirt over your carrier to provide more coverage at the sides if you have a slimmer carrier and feel more exposed there.  Some carriers have a wide enough body to "close any gaps".  With practice some mums can master feeding walking round breastfeeding in an upright hold too.

Wrap: More of a learning curve but excellent weight distribution and often very soothing for unsettled infants.

Ellaroo woven wrap

Kari-me stretchy wrap

A wrap can look a bit daunting at first, but I liken it to tying a shoelace - once you know how, it takes seconds and you could do it with your eyes closed.   There are a few typical carry positions for a very young infant that work well with breastfeeding.  For infants that prefer being in a cradle hold, this can be created as per the picture on the left.  To breastfeed you can move the inner layer aside and turn baby onto their side (you may need to sit down and loosen the wrap slightly, especially whilst still getting the hang) pulling the fabric up behind them.  For infants who prefer being more upright, you can use  it as per the picture on the right.  Again you can loosen the straps and pull the centre panel up as a cover.

The strategic blanket:

If you don't fancy a carrier, a strategic blanket can work well - particularly so if you just want a little extra coverage whilst baby is latching, but feel more comfortable once they're settled.  Not very practical if you have a wiggly baby who arches away from the breast, or one prone to flailing arms and legs; otherwise you can soon find you don't have enough hands to untangle baby and hold the blanket in place.  Alternatively some babies will tolerate something lighter like a muslin better, so they don't feel something heavy over their head.  Nell demonstrated this at the launch of one of our groups in the image on the right (there were a lot of cameras and a couple of TV teams vying for a shot!)

As a final note - remember you are simply giving your baby milk of his own species.  If someone is offended at you choosing not to give your baby an alternative which carries risks - who really has the problem?  Eyes have a handy avert function we can use if we would rather look somewhere else - where would the list end if we asked everyone to cover up everything that anyone could ever perceive as something they would rather not look at?

Related Posts:
Let's do breastfeeding covers
Breastfeeding in public is offensive - see for yourself

Let's do breastfeeding covers

Something I've discovered is that nursing covers are a controversial subject.  When I blogged a while ago discussing the questionable marketing techniques of Udder Covers, it was interesting the replies were frequently about covers in general - despite the post being about how the company were selling their item.

What's also interesting and quite significant, is how the conversation around nursing covers changes depending upon which area/country on the whole is discussing it.

In the UK nursing covers are still relatively uncommon - at least "Oop North" where I live, they are rarely seen; but then so are breastfeeding babies.  I've only seen a cover used once, in a cafe whilst feeding my youngest.  Perhaps because they aren't seen very often, I did think it a tad ironic that nobody even glanced at me feeding my son, whilst people were nearly falling off their chairs craning their necks to see what the wiggly floral package in the corner was - but I appreciate this is not the case everywhere.

In order to understand why in some areas breastfeeding covers have become so popular, we need to look at cultural norms.

Mother Nature didn't bank on breasts becoming taboo; sure they're placed in the most obvious location in terms of convenience, but social norms demand women (not men) now keep them covered - which obviously throws feeding an infant from them into rather interesting territory.

Discomfort with breastfeeding in public has been identified as a contributing factor in shaping infant feeding choice and the decision to stop breastfeeding in particular (McIntyre et al 1999; Smyth, 2008).

A paper by Kate Boyer also adds:

Breastfeeding outside the home is still relatively uncommon in the UK (Stewart-Knox et al, 2003; Tarrant and Kearney, 2008). This is problematic because decisions about infant feeding choice are influenced by women’s perceptions about how acceptable (or not) it is to breastfeed in public (McIntyre etal.,1999). Breastfeeding is not protected by law in the UK outside of Scotland, and there are strong social expectations that it be‘‘discreet’’, i.e.conducted in such a way that the breast is never actually visible (Bolling, 2006;Pain,etal.,2001).12

Aint that the truth?

Kate interviewed a small group of breastfeeding mothers about their perceptions of feeding in public, I think their comments echo many I have heard before:

CR remarked that ‘‘if you get your boob out and expose yourself it’s a little bit wrong’’. Indeed BL put it even more bluntly: ‘‘you get the eco-warrior types that are kind of like well it’s my right to breastfeed in public, and I’ll make a big scene of it, and I think that’s a bit unnecessary’’.

These comments convey some of the factors which can make breastfeeding outside the home a daunting prospect for some women, including lack of familial support or a broader cultural context in which it is normalized. They suggest the anxiety–and  in some cases antipathy–that can exist toward breastfeeding in public that is not sufficiently discreet, even on the part of women who have recently breastfeed in public themselves. Echoing the findings of Carpenter (2006), they convey the notion of breast-feeding as a public performance that is vetted by others.

So for some women the choice is not breastfeeding, or feeding with a cover.  Some express difficulty being discreet because of the positions they use, or because the size of their breasts, or because their baby likes to pull off and look round mid feed - It can be hard to feed "discreetly" at times, if discreet means never showing an inch of skin.

As the above highlights, being able to meet social expectations is a big factor for many in their feeding decision.  As one Facebook user recently stated: some women aren't interested in the big picture of changing culture, they just want to get on and feed their baby - and I totally agree with this!  If the only way a woman can bear to feed outside the home is with a cover - we absolutely have to hear what these mums are saying and respect their choices, encourage them, understand where they're coming from and realise why.

Does that mean we should all ignore the bigger picture and pretend it doesn't exist?  Absolutely not!  For other mothers want to provoke change, to remove the social boundaries above that hinder women in the first place - and we also have to respect, encourage and understand these women too.

For many women, breastfeeding in public is daunting the first few times you do it. 

Imagine you lived in a culture which was brought up believing women should always cover their knees.  Many wear long skirts for ease, but of course special knee covers were also available.  Knees were however used for marketing purposes - clad in a revealing lacy sock to advertise beer.

People got knee enhancements so they could wear a shorter skirt and have a titilating amount of their knee on display most of the time; men looked at pictures of knees and women who had smaller knees felt conscious - but it was ok because you could buy padded tights to enhance how others saw them ;)

Suddenly you have to feed a child from this very same knee!  You very rarely see anyone else knee feeding, and if you do the mum is always being extremely discreet so as not to show any knee skin.   How would you feel about whipping your knee out?  It's abnormal to see knees in this context, it's scary - others may judge whether an appropriate amount is being exposed.  It's totally normal to feel nervous at first until it's normalised to you!

This cultural change has only come about since the 1940s, despite the fact "discretion" is often called for to respect "the older generation". My late grandfather wasn't at all embarrassed about it, as he had grown up seeing women feed their babies anywhere and everywhere.  He mentioned as a boy he would often be squished up against a nursing mum on the bus home; he even recounted a tale where a mum was trying to feed her distracted toddler next to him, when she finally said in an exasperated voice, "if you don't stop messing about and just feed, I'm going to give it to this young man instead!".


Normal is to us what we see everyday.

Therefore you will find in areas nursing covers have become popular, their use is not limited purely to those who would otherwise have not breastfeed - they become "the trend" for other mothers too.  When I sat in the cafe with the mum with a cover, I felt strangely exposed - as though I was being all brazen doing it out in the open, compared to the modest mum in the corner.  And that's from someone who has breastfed pretty much everywhere and anywhere since those first few very nervous feeds outdoors!

If we saw most mothers breastfeeding and a few here and there using a cover - the covers would have no significance in the big picture.  But we don't see nursing mums everywhere, and so covers becoming popular can quickly become "the social norm", which rapidly morphs into "a social expectation".

And you know what?  Cover manufacturers know this.  So much so the company above gives out a free cover to all mums.  I've watched the threads on forums - one person shares the offer, people love a freebie and so will join in and get one; more so if a few others do it first and report it all great.  Before long most mums who are pregnant will have signed up for the free cover, they may plan to breastfeed (or try to) and so a cover is the logical accessory right?

I was quite shocked when a debate on this topic broke out on a predominantly US Facebook page.  The debate quickly shifted from whether covers were discreet - to a not insignificant number of breastfeeding mothers saying it was indiscreet to feed without a cover!  That when there is an item to ensure not a fleck of skin should be seen - you should use it to ensure modesty.

In some ways suggesting every women who feels nervous at feeding in public uses a cover - is akin to suggesting everyone having an "ugly day", wears a paper bag over their head.  If they feel so ugly they wont go out in public without, isn't the bag really such a bad thing?   But others want to tell these women they don't need to cover up!   They feel regardless of how things look, nobody is really paying much attention and the more that go "bagless", the more others will feel empowered to as well.  How they look is totally normal and doesn't need covering to be acceptable.

We have to see that both the big and small picture to effectively provoke change, and we have to acknowledge the language we use and that of those around us.

To conclude and almost come full circle, I thought I would share some the latest marketing offering from Udder Covers that plopped into my mailbox.  I've highlighted in red all the statements that undermine normal breastfeeding, and serve to perpetuate a culture that feels breastfeeding should be done, but not seen:

"Breastfeeding is a natural thing, but also a huge source of awkwardness for many women who nourish their little one in a public place. However, breastfeeding covers help lessen this discomfort and make it simple to do. While many people avert their eyes when they understand that you are tending your child, you are always nervous about who is watching (AA - If you weren't you are now!). You can be modest and keep your child comfy by using these covers that are now available in all kinds of colors and designs.

Most people will try using blankets or towels to conceal them while feeding but this can fall off or slither away if they aren’t alert. 

Whether you are out walking in the square or in a shopping center or even at a family get together, you can always feed the baby when it is hungry. Nothing much has to alter in your social life simply because you have a little one. (AA - Yes that's the joy of breastfeeding!)
Plenty of people are a bit awkward around breastfeeding moms and you can reduce the embarrassment by using the covers. (AA -Wow just in case you weren't feeling quite uncomfortable enough already, a guilt trip thrown in as well)
The shield also helps stop your newborn from distraction during breastfeeding by aiding their focus on you. This ensures the feed runs a lot smoother and quicker compared to not using a shield. (AA - Really is this an evidence based comment?  The feedback I hear is that for as many who find it helps with distraction, others will not feed well due to having fabric over their head!)

The discrete way fashionable breastfeeding covers make it simple for you to feed your infant quickly means you can safely give food to in the busiest environments (AA - Wow now not using a cover is unsafe!) without fear of awkwardness or causing any uncomfortable moments."

Coming up next - alternatives to covers if you feel self conscious.