Comments on Analytical Armadillo - The Booby Whisperer: I'm Going To Try Breastfeeding....

Exquise me Irish - have a tootle around the rest o...

2012-02-05T09:25:18.872Z

Exquise me Irish - have a tootle around the rest of my blog before telling me I need a little understanding. This entry is about the LANGUAGE we use.

nice article, but what about the mums that for med...

2012-02-05T08:18:36.769Z

nice article, but what about the mums that for medical reasons cant breastfeed? so you are saying that they are damaging their child?
a little understanding for those mums would help.

Sounds like a sneaky tongue tie to me Lily! Did a...

2012-01-30T20:15:14.698Z

Sounds like a sneaky tongue tie to me Lily! Did anyone ever get to the bottom of what was causing trauma? Severe persistent damage like that is I find heavily heavily linked to a restricted frenulum and the resulting compensatory piston action. Where did the damage start? Was it vertically down the centre of the nipple? top? side?

I was convinced I'd be able to breastfeed - co...

2012-01-30T19:08:00.026Z

I was convinced I'd be able to breastfeed - convinced and determined. I managed to breastfeed for 6 weeks (and I did have daily support for almost all that time). By the end of that period my breast tissue was so damaged it took three months for the injuries to heal - I think my conviction actually stopped me realising sooner that it was okay to stop, that I wasn't going to be the kind of mother I wanted to be.

I agree that positive language is important and think 'try' is such a feeble word. That said, I think we need to stay present, to pay attention to the reality of the moment. After all, language is not experience nor is it the whole of our 'reality'.

By the way, my 6 year old daughter tells me that 'try' is not a good word unless it ends in 'umph' (triumph)... courtesy of the movie "Happy Feet" apparently!

Actually Foxy, there are loads of damaged adults -...

2012-01-29T21:43:12.225Z

Actually Foxy, there are loads of damaged adults - but because 20 or more years have gone by people don't chalk it up to formula. Long term scientific studies are showing that FF babies DO grow up to have more diabetes, digestive disorders, immunological problems, obesity etc.
Breastfeeding wasn't easy for me at all, but I had great support, and I was determined. I'm still going at 16 months.

When I was pregnant with my first (19 years ago) I...

2012-01-29T20:43:26.544Z

When I was pregnant with my first (19 years ago) I was only 18 and no one in my family had ever breast fed. I said I WAS going to bf because it never occurred to me that a person might not be able to! And no family or friends could tell me what problems I might face because they'd never even tried! So I successfully breastfed (apart from the odd cracked nipple - no advice on positioning from the midwife). I also said I was going to bf my subsequent 3 children, which I did and continue to do despite occassional hiccups such as thrush, sore nipples and biting. Maybe my positive "I AM going to breastfeed" attitude helped? Great article AA, reminded me of Yoda - "Do or do not. There is no try." :D

Excellent article. When I was pregnant with my fir...

2012-01-29T19:49:07.943Z

Excellent article.
When I was pregnant with my first I really wanted to bf but didnt know if Id be able to! This is because the media and baby magazines (coincidentally sponsored by formula companies! ) portray this false belief that not every woman can,and that formula is normal and your baby sleeps better too!
When the baby was born I was thrilled to discover I could bf and it want brilliantly until I got breast tgptpg. After ages of agony when feeding we got it resolved and I never considered it the end of bf . But we only got it sorted with their help of a fantastic lc

2012-01-29T19:48:46.693Z

This comment has been removed by the author.

funny. I didn't drive for 10 years due to ina...

2012-01-29T19:01:29.148Z

funny. I didn't drive for 10 years due to inadequate support!

Sorry for the repeat last paragraph- really strugg...

2012-01-29T09:01:30.262Z

Sorry for the repeat last paragraph- really struggling to post from my phone!

I think the problem is that first time mothers can...

2012-01-29T08:58:56.918Z

I think the problem is that first time mothers can feel like they will come across as arrogant if they say 'I'm going to breastfeed'. I know this was the case for me- I felt like there were those 'in the know' I.e those who had had babies, understood the sleepless nights, bought the Tshirt, and those who would be seen as hopelessly naive if they deigned to use such positive language as 'I will do x, y and z'. A bit like natural childbirth... people looked at me as naive if I said I didn't plan to use pain relief (and btw I ended up with an emergency c section and epidural despite 40 odd hours without pain relief, so I know things don't always go to plan'. If we have another baby I will definitely feel more justified and confident in saying 'I will...' or 'I plan to', while still recognising that things sometime
E's don't go to plan (in which case I will THEN deal with it and seek support). But as a second time
Mother I feel I would be viewed differently from a first timer. You are completely right that we should be building up confidence amongst mothers to be rather than subtly undermining them, thereby causing them to doubt themselves, their bodies and their instinct from the outset.

If we have another I am going to be much more positive in my language, while recognising that sometimes things don't go to plan (and if that is the case I will know how to access support). But then as a second time mother I would feel more justified in having the confidence to use positive language. We should encourage first time mothers to have similar confidence in their bodies, rather than deliberately and subtly undermining them from the outset.

QUOTE FoxyJan 28, 2012 02:08 PM What a load of rub...

2012-01-29T07:46:29.491Z

QUOTE FoxyJan 28, 2012 02:08 PM
What a load of rubbish ! Only someone who hasn't struggled or gone through heart ache trying to BF could write this, and to suggest that there is a lack of studies about the safety of formula-oh please! Therefore there must be millions of. 'damaged' adults out there from being FF! Complete nonsense!

I think maybe you've misunderstood the point of the article - Whether I had problems (which actually I did first time around) isn't really relevant to a piece suggesting mums to have a positive mental outlook?

QUOTE to suggest that there is a lack of studies about the safety of formula-oh please!

That's not so much a suggestion as a statement of fact. In all the studies the milk of our own species is shown to have "better outcome", this tells us not breastfeeding gives an outcome not as good...

But to go back to the piece - this paragraph feels quite relevant in this case:
"What a fantastic market that you only get customers if they stop breastfeeding, and then although you as a company may be key in the reason why these mothers failed - they then defend your product. Genius."

AA

Foxy, she said there is a lack of studies 'dem...

2012-01-29T06:57:58.958Z

Foxy, she said there is a lack of studies 'demonstrating its safety'. Not a lack of studies demonstrating the harm that formula can cause. And yes, there *are* millions of damaged adults out there. Most adults I know have *some* form of health problem. We just don't necessarily know the root of an individual's damage, but looking at the stats, it's clear that widespread formula use isn't helping matters.

What AA is talking about here is the attitude that bf probably won't work, and if it doesn't that doesn't matter. The fact is that, WITH SUPPORT, bf probably WILL work (most problems are solvable). If that attitude prevailed, rather than the 'oh well, you tried, here's some formula' attitude - those who struggle to bf would be more likely to get the support they need, and IF they are in the 2-5% who can't, they'd get more sympathy and less guilt when forced to turn to formula.

I struggled and went through heart ache. It took m...

2012-01-28T23:53:15.124Z

I struggled and went through heart ache. It took me 14 weeks before I could exclusively breastfeed, and even then gave the odd top-up because of all of the weeks I'd been told 'I couldn't do it' by health professionals. I thought I would be able to do it right up until the first midwife in hospital told me I wasn't managing. I didn't have a few carton's of formula, 'just in case' - I never wanted to formula feed. One midwife bought me some and told me I could give it just after another had told me to throw away the colostrum I'd spent so long collecting. I always find the stereotype of the 'breastapo' midwife telling a sobbing mother she HAS to breastfeed 'or else' a little hard to swallow (no pun intended) given that my experience was so far from this.
The issue is support, which I got from the most fantastic, helpful, non-judgmental women once we'd left hospital, but that first week (and the continued insistence by health visitors that I should overfeed my son - give him 70mls at 3 days, 120mls at 1 month - I'm not making this up) knocked my confidence even when supply ceased to be a problem.
I can find only one suggestion of 'damaged' adults, and that's in your post. My own son did, however, suffer a 6 month lactose intolerance. Whether you think it's the 'next best thing' or not, it's not the same, and rather than feeling such indignation towards women who try to raise the issue, wouldn't our time be better spent asking why so many sources keep telling us that modified cow's milk is no different from human milk?
In the end, we're all doing our best, and I'm not suggesting that a woman who formula feeds loves her child less - for several months that woman was me at least 4 times a day - but, as this post suggests, we need to look again at our society and ask why failure is assume a priori.

2012-01-28T22:17:34.517Z

This comment has been removed by the author.

2012-01-28T22:08:00.272Z

This comment has been removed by the author.

This got me thinking. I was determined with no. 1,...

2012-01-28T21:53:26.227Z

This got me thinking. I was determined with no. 1, or rather, formula was just not on my mind. I was simply going to breastfeed because why wouldn't I. I struggled big time (I didn't know that there could be pain, I didn't know how much pain there could be, I also didn't know how to make sure I got the right support) so with no. 2 my attitude was that I wouldn't struggle like that again and rather supplement (without beating myself up) - now, interestingly this more relaxed attitude led to exclusive bf (not achieved first time around, I supplemented with formula once a fortnight from 12 weeks) maybe because I was more relaxed? A friend had the same experience, maybe it's just that second timers find it easier, I don't know. I mean, I totally get your point and think you are very right, just that in my case this "I'll give it a try" attitude still led to success, and more so than determination, so it doesn't HAVE to lead to stopping breastfeeding.

Well said. You have to go in to the relationship w...

2012-01-28T21:01:39.091Z

Well said. You have to go in to the relationship with determination not to fail, and only education will make more women determined to do more than try, but succeed. If people aren't able to say a positive word about breastfeeding without being labelled as "militant" or a "breastfeeding Nazi" then how can the masses be educated? We're stuck in a cycle of our own stupidity. People need to own their actions and stop the cries of guilt and bullying, and admit that in most cases, if they sought help when they were struggling, they would succeed. I saw 1 doctor, 2 health visitors, 3 midwives, a breastfeeding counsellor, a peer supporter, and when no one could help, the baby cafe. If they hadn't referred my DS for his TT I would have kept trying.

Love it! I got asked in my second pregnancy if I w...

2012-01-28T20:24:09.483Z

Love it! I got asked in my second pregnancy if I was going to 'try breastfeeding'. I just replied "No, I AM going to breastfeed. Considering that one *points to toddler* is still feeding I think I stand a good chance". She actually hugged me. Its almost like they are scared to bring it up for fear of being labeled pushy. Ah well, 8 weeks in, not a bottle, artificial nipple or drop of formula in the house and I'm still 'trying'!!!

Well written, well said :)

2012-01-28T20:14:05.028Z

Well written, well said :)

Great post! I got tons of those comments when I wa...

2012-01-28T20:08:19.436Z

Great post! I got tons of those comments when I was pregnant. People would say "well I didnt produce enough, baby wouldnt latch, it hurt, plenty of women cant do it so be prepared just in case it doesnt work for you." I told them all that I was confident; my mother had done it, so I could do it too. I took the stance that breastfeeding WOULD work out for me, and that my son would NEVER have formula (I was right, by the way). I refused to learn how to prepare a bottle or buy any "just in case" formula. I'm glad of it, because a few weeks into breastfeeding, my son was clusterfeeding. At that point I was unaware of what clusterfeeding was and I was worried that I wasnt producing enough milk. If I had had formula available at that time, I very likely would have given in to it and ruined breastfeeding for good. Thankfully for blogs like AA and other bf support pages on facebook, I learned what clusterfeeding is, along with loads more. I wish I hadnt been too sick to do research online when I was pregnant; it would have made the early days much easier. Instead the only information I had was from one breastfeeding class offered by WIC, and the pamphlets they handed out after that class. Thankfully that, along with my confidence, was enough. Still nursing at 14 months :)

Excellent post! So true! I hate when I hear, I&#...

2012-01-28T20:03:23.633Z

Excellent post! So true! I hate when I hear, I'm gonna try...etc. Decide to do it and give it everything you got, if it doesn't work, then you at least know you gave it everything!